Domestic violence. A tragedy often going unseen behind the closed doors of our friends and neighbors. Victims afraid to speak up, worried of the judgment from others, the threats from their abuser, feeling stuck in the isolation that their abusers create. You may know someone who is going through domestic violence, or you may suspect it but say nothing because no words seem quite right. Have you ever passed judgment on someone going through it? Not understanding how they could put themselves in this situation, wondering why they would stay? Have you wanted to help, but didn’t know how?
Let’s talk about it, because talking about it and caring about it saves lives!
Beneath the surface of physical abuse is mental and emotional manipulation, abuse, and coercion. Perpetrators seek women who they perceive as vulnerable and susceptible to their grooming. Many victims have suffered previous trauma from their childhood, which can lead to vulnerabilities and lack of knowledge on what healthy love may look like.
Fearing criticism, judgment, and lack of understanding from their loved ones many victims do not speak out and suffer in silence. Here’s how you can help:
Be open, understanding, and non-judgmental in conversations about the abuse
Start a non-judgmental conversation expressing your worries and letting them know they don’t have to share anything with you, but that you are here for them if they ever want to talk or need help finding safety
Make sure they know the domestic violence hotline number: 800-799-SAFE
Can you be on their list of people to call when they need a quick getaway, emotional support, or someone to call a shelter or the police?
Help them make a hidden go bag with clothes, money, and a cell phone
Have a safe word/message they can text you when they are unsafe, so you know when to call for help
Help them plan an escape route
Help them connect with neighbors if they ever need to get away in a hurry
Post resources on your social media so that those around you know that you are an ally
Support non-profit organizations that help victims and survivors of domestic violence
Share, consider volunteering or fostering for the Paw in Hand Project to break down barriers for people seeking safety who do not want to abandon their pets in their escape
Pray for these individuals
Be there and just listen to their story without interrupting!
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